In So Many Words

When I originally started writing this post, my first sentence read, “Every year I get a little bit better at this transition stuff, both in terms of what Michael needs and what I need.”

After the day we had today, I think that is true in terms of better knowing what I need but not so true in terms of really knowing what Michael needs.

Kindergarten
When Michael was entering kindergarten, we participated in all the events the school had for incoming students. They actually did a really nice job with it, and I think Michael handled the transition as well as could be expected. I, on the other hand, was a nervous wreck, especially as the first week went by and I still hadn’t seen the daily schedules or communication book that were promised in the IEP.

I eventually got up my nerve and contacted the school team and found out where we were with both of those items and was happy to see them come home during the second week of school. The teacher didn’t ever acknowledge Michael’s disability, but our behavioral support person and the rest of the team seemed to just work around her and he did okay (she retired at the end of that year after 36 years of teaching).

First Grade
To prepare for the transition to first grade, we had Michael visit one of the classrooms in the spring of his kindergarten year. We then planned a visit for the week before school started to meet the teacher and see his classroom and his desk. It was a short visit but did help Michael know what to expect for the first day of school.

I was still nervous, especially since I didn’t get much of a feel for the teacher or know whether the agreed-upon supports would be ready for the beginning of the year. The teacher turned out to be fabulous, despite the stress of waiting for the team to finalize Michael’s behavior plan and dealing with a behavioral support person who really wasn’t suited for the job.

Last year was a long series of ups and downs, both as a team and for Michael, but we ended the year on a good note and with a solid IEP for second grade.

Second Grade
In the spring of first grade, the entire class took a trip around the corner to see the second grade classrooms and meet the teachers. This was a nice way for Michael to learn about what to expect the following year without being singled out as difference (something he is becoming more and more sensitive about).

Just like last year, we scheduled a time for Michael to visit his classroom and meet the teacher again the week before school started. That visit took place last Wednesday and went very well. He had a ton of questions about everything, and I was happy that the sub who will be teaching while Mrs. G. is on maternity leave was there as well.

In addition to the classroom visit for Michael, I also requested a meeting with the case manager, second grade teacher, and Michael’s behavior specialist consultant. That meeting, which also included the other second grade teacher and the principal, took place a couple of weeks ago and was definitely the missing piece of the puzzle for my own anxiety about “back to school.”

We spent about an hour together answering the teachers’ questions about Michael and the IEP, especially regarding his behavior plan and safe crisis plan. I was able to share what we have been working on this summer and discuss how we could all work together for the best start to the school year.

Reality
Today was Michael’s first day of second grade. I arrived to pick him to find that he had been upset and crying since about 2pm and had not participated in art or anything that took place after story time. From what I can tell, he spent most of the last hour and forty-five minutes in his quiet spot, and at some point threw his shoes and at another point walked past the teacher and swung at her, lightly hitting her stomach (did you notice the part where she is going on maternity leave very soon?).

I waited in the hall for the other students to be dismissed and could hear that Michael was still upset. He did eventually calm down enough to get his things together and come out to me in the hallway, at which point he broke down in tears again. Once he had calmed down a little bit, I asked him if he would be able to apologize to the teacher for his actions but he was still too upset.

I’m still piecing the story together from what Michael’s been able to tell me and a conversation with his behavior support person. Although I am frustrated, I am not as overwhelmed as I would have been in the past and I can take some action without totally losing my cool as I would have in the past.

Related Posts:

• Autism & Reading Comprehension by Joseph Porter
• Guest Post: Teach Contextual Sensitivity to Children on the Spectrum
• How Do I Teach This Kid to Read? by Kimberly A. Henry