In So Many Words

Stress-Free Believers
Author: Harold Metzel
www.stressfreebelievers.com
Publisher: 10-Talent Believers
Paperback: 198 pages
Retail: $12.95

Welcome to my first blog book tour! If you aren’t familiar with how these work, here’s the basics: several bloggers agree to host a particular book at a particular time and share the information about the book and author with their readers. I have also included my personal take on the book.

This particular tour also includes a grand prize giveaway. To enter, simply leave a comment on this post by midnight on September 18th. I will pick one at random to be entered into the giveaway, which will be drawn and announced by the tour sponsor on September 26th.

***UPDATE: Deadline on this giveaway has been extended to midnight on Thursday, September 22nd.***

Book Summary

Stress-Free Believers helps you dethrone the stress bully that is often caused by loss of employment, marital conflict, credit card debt, and countless other pressure points. Here is the battle plan you need to get harmful stress off your back so you can manage the tough times with composure.

You’ll learn how to:

• Convert your thoughts from worry to faith.
• Develop patience in the midst of chaos.
• Take control of your thinking, emotions, and commitments.
• Identify the tools God has given you to overcome stress.
• Recognize the part you play in God’s comprehensive plan.
• Allow God to work in your life as He did in the life of Jesus.

This step-by-step guide shows how to reduce unhealthy levels of stress in each area of daily living. The objective is not just to overcome our ordeals but to do so without anxiety.

Check out a video excerpt from the book:

Author Bio

Harold Metzel, a 30-year veteran as pastor, missionary, Bible College president and VP of a large charitable foundation in San Diego, currently coaches individuals and pastoral staff on ways to become even better stewards of what God has given.

When visiting churches across the nation, he demonstrates ways to avoid unnecessary taxation, increase income using current assets, and provide a more effective inheritance. After counseling with many stressed-out believers, he now offers practical steps to bring stress back to a healthy level. For more information see: www.haroldmetzel.com or www.stressfreebelievers.com.

Grand Prize Giveaway

($66.35 Value)

• Stress-Free Believers Book
• Stress-Free Believers Group Study DVD
• Stress-Free Believers 5-CD Audio Book
• Stress Relief Aromatherapy from Bath & Body Works
• 1.6 oz Filled Candle
• Travel-Size Body Wash & Foam Bath
• Travel-Size Body Lotion

To win an entry into the giveaway, simply leave a comment on this post by midnight on September 18th. One person will be chosen at random to be entered into the drawing for the grand prize, which will be announced on September 26th by the tour sponsor.

My Thoughts

I have to say this book confused me a bit. He starts out with some really good points about separating the stress you are experiencing from the actual problems that need to be dealt with. He says, and I agree, that you will be much more able to take care of things once you have acknowledged what emotions you are going through and get them under control.

I am not sure that I agree completely with his theology about what it means to be born again, however. When he talks about believers having dual citizenship in the world, that is fine, but he also states that we have a dual nature which is constantly pulling us back towards sin. I have always understood that the “old man” had died and our sinful nature had been redeemed when we became believers.

As the book goes on, the author gets into a lot of discussion about God’s plan for the world and our role as managers and stewards of it. I realized later on that this book was written as a lead-up to his book on financial responsibility, and it does make more sense in that context.

If you are looking for a book focusing on stress, this would not be the one I would choose. But if you are interested in the topic of Christian stewardship and are on the same page as him theologically, this would make a good choice for personal or group study.

Note: This is Book #79 of my 2011 Reads (master list here). I received a review copy for free, and all opinions and comments are my own.

My husband and son went away to Virginia this weekend. They do this every few weeks and it is wonderful. It gives me some much-needed down time without anyone asking for my attention

Sometimes I am able to use this time very well and other times it doesn’t feel like it was helpful at all, and then I end up even more frustrated.

Feeling like I used the time well doesn’t seem to directly relate to how much I got done, but rather to how my mental state is during and at the end of it. If my mind is clear, I can choose whether to relax or to plow through my to do list and feel good about either one. If I am avoiding thinking through the things that are worrying me or that I “should” be doing, it doesn’t matter what I do – I end up feeling miserable.

About a year or so ago, I read the book Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity by David Allen and it really spoke to me. I have attempted to follow his principles with varying degrees of success depending on the day or week.

Today I saw that he had posted a video of a talk he did at The Do Lectures in Wales, and it was quite good. It only touches on the GTD principles but is a nice introduction to him for anyone unfamiliar with his ideas. Here it is for anyone who may be interested:

If the video doesn’t show up here, you can also see it on the GTD website. One of the comments that jumped out at me was, “Once you pay attention to what has your attention, you’ll find out what has your attention.” I think this is so true for me; until I make some decisions about what I want to happen and what I need to do about the things that are bothering me, I can’t move forward on anything.

I’m not sure what time they are coming home, but I am planning to use the next couple of hours to write down everything that is on my mind and see if I can’t make a bit of clear space in my head. I did manage to do some cleaning up this morning, so at least I feel that I have provided a relatively nice environment for the guys to come home to. I did not get to the writing/blogging I had planned but am hoping that I can set the stage for the rest of the week to be a bit more freeflowing and creative.

I’m wondering if anyone can relate to this and what you do to get yourself organized mentally when you feel stressed out or how things weighing on your mind that you don’t really want to deal with. Anyone care to share?

As I was spending some time online the other day reading about various aspects of depression and anxiety, I took a break to check my GReader and what did I see but Janice at 5 Minutes for Mom talking about her own experience with those issues. It’s amazing how many people struggle with some form of these disorders, myself included.

For those who commented on yesterday’s post about taking Michael to a psychologist, I am going to follow up on it soon, but in the meantime I wanted to talk a bit about a recent therapy session of my own. I have been seeing this particular therapist for several months, but hadn’t been in for a few weeks, mainly due to the busyness of the holidays.

When he asked how things were going, I had plenty of things I could talk to him about that either had already happened or that I was anticipating coming up in the near future. But I have been feeling a bit like a hamster on a wheel and afraid that, if I can’t keep going fast enough, there will be a horrible crash at some point. I really needed more than to talk through one or two specific situations.

So I asked him if he could tell me what I needed to do to get to the point where my moods would not be so driven by circumstances and other people’s words and actions, where I could just be me and have control over myself, even when things may be out of control.

His response was fairly simple — Know your limits, and accept them.

As he put it, some people don’t know what their limits are and so they just keep taking on whatever comes their way without even realizing that it is more than they should expect from themselves. The first step is to become aware of your own limitations in terms of energy, time, resources and ability.

That’s hard enough, but then comes the even trickier part – accepting your limits.

Some people can see their limits but refuse to accept them. So they will keep shouldering more commitments and responsibilities even though they know it will add too much stress to their lives. It’s not enough to know your limits, you have to accept them – even when that means becoming your own advocate with others who want you to perform for them.

That was a surprisingly new concept for me, that I need to advocate for myself just as much as I advocate for Michael.

It really comes down to examining each thing that comes your way and identifying what control you have over it and whose responsibility it is. If it’s someone else’s responsibility, all you can do is pass it on to them and let it go. If it’s your responsibility, you need to decide if it’s within your limits to take care of right now. If that’s not possible, the next step is to figure out when you could do it or get someone else to handle it.

I’m just starting to think through all of this, so I’m probably not repeating it exactly right or in a very eloquent manner, but I can definitely see how it gives me the control that has been so easily given away to other people and circumstances in my life.

What do you think about his answer? Do you know your limits? Have you accepted them?